First - the credits: I found this via Loosewire, via Joi Ito, via Dvorak.
It's a funny translation of selected portions of Adobe's FAQ about their acquisition of Macromedia.
My favorite sections:
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"How many employees does Macromedia have?
Macromedia has approximately 1,450 employees worldwide.
Please note use of present tense.
"How many employees does Adobe have?
Adobe has approximately 4,000 employees worldwide.
Ditto regarding use of present tense. Please also note that PDF
is an excellent format for sending out résumés."
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And the best one ...
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"Do you anticipate a reduction in force as a result of this transaction?
When two successful growing companies join together, the result is a combined organization that creates new and exciting opportunities. The combination will lead to powerful new areas of innovation, new products and solutions, and an acceleration of our respective growth agendas. At the same time, there will be some duplication of employee functions between the two companies, and upon the close of the transaction, we anticipate some level of reduction in force. While we anticipate the integration team will identify opportunities for cost savings, the primary motivation for this acquisition is to continue to expand and grow our businesses into new markets.
Yes."
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